Would it look too desperate if I posted this ad in my local newspaper? Or maybe I could post my status on facebook as: Jealous that my husband is enjoying a Dad’s Night Out, and I’m home. My self-pity got even worse when my neighbor mentioned she was going out for dinner tonight with some girlfriends.
Is what I’m experiencing normal? Did you come to a point in bringing up your children when you just became so absorbed in their needs, their desires – that you lost yourself. You know – I don’t want to say it that way. I think what I really mean is that I lost my social self. Here I study social understanding, write social stories, and try to teach social skills – meanwhile I’ve lost my social life! When I had babies at home, it seemed there was more of a network of other mothers of young children. And before we had children it was easier to meet up with other young couples.
But where’s my network now? The other moms who want to enjoy a night out with friends, who don’t want to talk about their kids, who want to laugh and enjoy good conversation. Oh yeah, they too are likely picking up school papers off their kitchen counter; readying backpacks for tomorrow; going through the mail; doing laundry; thinking about how badly their house needs to be cleaned; making dinner; reading bedtime stories; doing… doing… doing.
And right on cue, another “So excited for tonight – it’s Girls-Night-Out!” status pops up on my facebook news feed. Yuck. Today…I just don’t wanna know.
Kara
Kara – this is a phase that I think every mother of young children experiences. I was once told by a friend, “If you don’t live within a 5 mile radius of me, don’t ever plan on seeing me.” My particular situation isn’t helped by the fact that we live WAAAAAAY out in the country. I have to be very forceful about wanting to get together with people, because we are all so busy, none of us will take the initative. Pray specifically that the Lord would bring someone into your life with a similar situation who also longs for fellowship, but who understands the constraints of our everyday lives. You are NOT alone, friend!
I am right there with you. I was even on a different forum and there were a dozen women talking about the same thing. I have fixed that left out feeling by just embracing that my job right now is taking care of my husband, children and home. This is who I am for now I show them I can entertain myself with any crafty thing I find fun. There have been the posts I have seen about the girls night out that were not appropriate and I am glad I wasn’t there. Turn your eyes on Jesus and He will life your spirits and carry you through this alone time.