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Communication Vacation

July 31, 2012 By Leave a Comment

Me and Andrew-the son we took to Europe

I just got back from almost a month in Europe. My husband and I took our second oldest son and a friend of his on a tour of Europe by train. It was a bit crazy and I can’t even recount all of the countries we went through without help (there were 10, I think)–because parts of it seem like a blur! But, it was an adventure and it was fun. Meanwhile on the home front the two youngest were left behind in the care of their grandmother with help from a few other friends.
I’m going to tell you something and I hope you don’t start thinking less of me, but I’m going to tell you anyway. I only talked to my children one time during the entire time I was away. And that was on my birthday. I sent them messages through facebook and posted pictures of where we were everytime I had internet access. I set up a free texting account so that my daughter who isn’t on facebook could send me messages. But other than that, I didn’t communicate with them for 24 days!
My son who will be in the tenth grade and has AS struggles with anxiety about school starting every year—this has gone on since fifth grade. School this year would be starting less than a week after I got home from my trip. While I was gone Stephen had to be responsible for reading two books for English and two books for his first AP (college credit) class. He also had to find newspaper articles and write a paragraph about each of them. Then, there was a packet of homework for German. The bottom line was I was afraid to talk to my own children because I didn’t want to have to deal with his anxiety.
When I asked him how it was going in a facebook message he told me he was behind on his schedule. Later he sent me a message that he was having trouble sleeping (which is NOT unusual at this time of year). If I was home I would know how to manage the situation, but I wasn’t and I had to make a decision to not let what I could not do long-distance ruin the rest of my trip. So, I sent this message:
I don’t know when we can skype again-we are moving around a lot and don’t usually know ahead of time when we’ll have internet.

How much do you lack in finishing that book? If it isn’t too much work hard to finish it & don’t worry about it being a few days late back to the library.
I love you, Stephen. You can handle this. Do the best you can. Think of it step by step & don’t get overwhelmed by the big picture.
If you need help getting organized we can get someone there to help you, but I can’t do it from here & it is just going to cause me stress the rest of the trip if you expect me to get you through this. I don’t want to sound mean, but I can’t help you from here.
I love you!!!

He replied with a message saying he wasn’t that far behind. Then, four days later I got this message:
Mom I am so happy and excited! In my summer reading not only am I caught up I am ahead 5 DAYS!!! I love y’all and miss you so much! Message you later!
Ahhhh. Big sigh of relief. He finished his reading. I didn’t have to hold his hand through it. And maybe, just maybe we both grew a little bit through the process. The next time he leans on me a little too much I’ll remember the summer of 2012 when Stephen stepped up and got himself ready for school. And I let him.
~Louise

Filed Under: Asperger, Parenting, school Tagged With:

Full of Surprises

July 30, 2012 By Leave a Comment

Son Dan (18, autism) is a rising senior, and of course, his dad and I have already begun the search for an appropriate placement for him after graduation.

 

We have investigated College Internship Program, College Living Experience, Beacon College, Full Sail University, and Horizons School, plus several others we rejected immediately. Our dilemma is that we don’t know whether he will get a standard or modified diploma, which will set him on a particular trajectory. I have blogged about this before with “It All Boils Down To One Test,” which Dan recently came within TWO POINTS of passing on his second try. What is that, one question???? Anyway, I digress …. Jim and I have had private discussions of our preferences, and were wondering how we were going to tell him Full Sail was not an option because of the lack of on-campus residential facilities and transportation problems.

 

On our most recent vacation to fulfill his life-long dream of going to The Price is Right for his 18th birthday (he did not get called to “come on down”), we were talking with some friends over dessert who asked Dan what his after-high school plans were. I jumped in with “Well, it depends on this one test,” followed by a lengthy explanation, when he piped up, “I know where I want to go to college.” Wide-eyed, hubby and I looked at each other, and said “Really! Where do you want to go?” fearing an emotional debate on Full Sail right then and there. “Beacon College,” he said, OUR NUMBER ONE CHOICE! We were astonished and delighted!

 

Two great things came out of this.  We got to explain to him that he had to pass this last state-mandated test to get a standard diploma to go to Beacon, so now he is really motivated. His wonderful public school is providing him with a summer tutor to help him pass his third retake, and we were not going to make him take it again after the third try. Dan said, “What happens if I fail again?” “Dad and I are not going to make you take this test 4 times (reading comprehension is a core deficit of autism, after all), but if you don’t pass, you can’t go to Beacon, but we will find a good place for you.” “Then I want to keep taking it until I pass.” My precious, precious boy. The second thing was the confirmation of God’s graciousness to us.  I had been praying, “Father, just guide our steps. You don’t need to show me right now where he is going to go, I just know if You direct our next step, we will ultimately arrive at Your will for him. We know You have specific people You want to bless by bringing Dan into their lives. Take us there.” Of course, at this point, Beacon is not a fait accompli. He has to pass the test. He has to be accepted. But we feel better equipped for the journey because of this experience.

 

Full of surprises.

 

~ Danz Mom, Peggy

Filed Under: Autism, Parenting, school Tagged With: , ,

The Great Cami Calamity (On How God Gave Us a Dentist)

July 29, 2012 By Leave a Comment

A few days ago, Nancy wrote about her struggle to find a therapist for herself. We face a similar dilemma with Cami on many of the “normal kids’ doctors” front. God is so faithful, though, to guide us to the health professionals who are best for Cami and her needs. Sometimes, God leads us by trial and error. Other times, it takes a calamity.

When we moved to Virginia, Cami was five years old. She had tubes in both her ears and wore glasses for strabismus (eyes crossing). Although we didn’t have a professional diagnosis, we knew Cami processed life differently than other kids her age. That meant Cami’s Mommy (me) was a nervous wreck taking Cami to a new doctor. Or dentist. Or anyone who would poke and prod her.

We found a reputable pediatric practice. The doctors were doctors–not mean, but not overly personable. The nurses gave her shots and wanted to take blood to test her cholesterol. It took three of us to hold her down for the blood test. I’m sure people in the parking lot could hear her screaming. It hurt my heart to see Cami so scared and upset. We eventually discovered that Cami trusted the nurse practitioner, so we made all out appointments with her. Until she moved away.

We found a reputable pediatric dentist. The first few visits went fine, and then it happened. We went in for a routine cleaning at the end of the day. When they lowered Cami’s head too far backwards, she couldn’t breathe through her nose. Of course, the dentist stuck his hands in Cami’s mouth, and Cami started flapping her hands and pushing to sit up.

The dentist tried to keep her in a lying-down position so he could finish his work (counting teeth, I think). Cami fought harder. I stepped in and said, “Wait. Let her sit up.” I knew my child wouldn’t disobey an adult’s direct orders unless there was an extenuating reason. In this case, she couldn’t breathe.

The situation quickly deteriorated because now, she was crying. The dentist said (and I quote), “Oh, come on. You’re too old to act like this.”

Well. She was seven, and we were new on this hidden-disability road. I didn’t trust my mommy-knower back then like I do now. Cami was due for her first set of dental x-rays, and here she was, melting down in the dental chair. The dentist was looking at me like he expected me to make her “behave appropriately.” So I tried.

I tried to comfort her. She blew her nose which helped her breathe better when she was lying down. I held her hand while the dentist finished the exam. She’d had her teeth cleaned, so she was already overloaded with stimuli. I know that now. I didn’t know that then.

We pushed ahead through the x-rays. Everything was holding together until I had to stand out of Cami’s sight behind a wall during the x-ray. She lost it. She started screaming, “No! I want my mom! No! Don’t you keep my mom from me! Don’t you make her go away! Mom!” Oh, my heart broke.

I stepped around the wall and said, “That’s enough.” We didn’t get an x-ray. We sat in the car and snuggled until we were both calm enough to drive home. We never went back to that dentist again. No hard feelings, just not a good fit for Cami and her different needs.

I dreaded finding another dentist. So I didn’t. I made sure Cami brushed her teeth, I limited her sugar intake, and I prayed. A lot. I knew Cami needed to have her teeth cleaned. Just like she needed to have her ears checked. And her eyes checked (dilated every six months: talk about trauma!). She needed wellness check ups and vaccinations. It felt like every time I turned around, we were visiting another health professional and returning home in meltdown mode.

When Cami was nine, she crashed her scooter. It was a Saturday afternoon, and the neighborhood kids were riding scooters on the sidewalk. One friend tried to pass Cami, who ended up veering into the grass, which stopped her scooter but not her. She hit the ground so hard, it broke her helmet. And both bones in her left wrist. And her front tooth.

We never did find the piece of her tooth. We did, however, find a compassionate, understanding pediatric dentist who waited in her office on a Saturday afternoon until we could get Cami there. She calmly talked Cami through x-rays, never letting her tone of voice change in response to Cami’s fear and screaming. I was so impressed.

Cami’s positive experience with the new dentist helped her find language for the visit to the emergency room the next day. Although Cami said her wrist didn’t hurt her, I could see she wasn’t using it. We spent our Church Day that week at the ER getting her wrist x-rayed just like she had her teeth x-rayed.  She told me, “It must be all right, because it didn’t hurt when they x-rayed my teeth. So this won’t hurt at all.” Whewy.

By the end of the week, Cami had a temporary cap on her tooth and a green cast on her arm. Not only did God lead us to the right dentist for Cami, but He also led us to one of the best pediatric orthopedists in our area. What started as a calamity ended up equipping my girl to handle some tough stuff. Three years later, Cami loves going to the dentist. Really. Cami uses her words when she’s uncomfortable or when she needs to sit up, and the dental staff listen to her. I think the listening—their validation of Cami’s expressed needs—makes a big difference in Cami’s dental experience.

Now if we can only find the right pediatrician for Cami. Without a calamity.

Grateful for God’s leading,

Cassandra

Filed Under: Parenting, Provision, Sensory Processing Disorder Tagged With: , ,

Predator

July 28, 2012 By Leave a Comment

We checked in to a Los Angeles hotel just outside LAX for an easy transition for our cross-country flight home the next day. Dan (18, autism) made a mad dash for the lobby bathroom while Jim and I registered at the front desk. The 3 of us got into the elevator to lug our luggage (aha moment: THAT’s why they call it ‘luggage!’) to the room.

 

In the elevator, Dan said, “Well, my wallet is a lot lighter.” “What do you mean?” “A man in the bathroom asked if I had any money to help him get his car back because it was towed, and I said all I had was a hundred dollar bill.” “You GAVE him the money Grammy gave you for your BIRTHDAY?” “That’s all I had!” “Well, we are going to put our stuff in the room and go back down to report this to Security!” “NO, MOM! What’s wrong with trying to HELP someone?”

 

My precious boy. And I am spitting mad an adult male took advantage of my special needs kid! And my 6’3″ 250-pounder doesn’t want to report him. What to do? How can I MAKE him come with me? “Well then, we are just going to ‘stop-and-wait-until-you-change-your-mind.’ We are going to sit here, no TV, no dinner, no nothing, until you change your mind, because that man lied to you, and we need to try and get your money back.” “He LIED to me?”

 

My sweet, sweet boy. “Oh, ALRIGHT! I changed my mind!”

 

So we went down to our desk clerk, who reported it to Security. We tried to get a description from Dan. “Was he taller or shorter than you?” “Shorter.” (Most people are!)  ”Older or younger than me and Dad?” “ Older”. (Really? At 56 and 55, we are no spring chickens!) “Overweight or skinny?” “Mom, it’s not nice to talk about that!” (Oh, for Pete’s sake!) “Was he Caucasian like us, or Black or Hispanic or any other race?” “It’s not nice to talk about that either!” “We’re just trying to get a description, not racial profiling! What was he wearing? Was his shirt short sleeves or long? ” “White shirt with short sleeves and a black vest.” (Well, NOW we are getting somewhere!) So with this description, the security guy saw him on camera walking out the back door, down the street, out of camera range.

 

The hotel staff did everything they could. They called in the valet from the front door and showed him the video and told him to report the guy if he ever showed up again. (The black vest made him look like a driver of some kind.) They reported it to the General Manager. They gave us a breakfast coupon, and none of this was their fault. They took our home phone number and said they would call if they got a chance to confront the guy. Which was more than the police did, who wouldn’t even come to look at the video because no force or threat was used against our newly-adult son.

 

So then I had to explain the concept of ‘bad people’ to Dan, who constantly berates himself for “what a FOOL I was!” and asking how he can get his money back.  How an adult male should NEVER ask a teenager for help unless he is bleeding. How you don’t HAVE to help if you don’t want to, and if you DO want to help, never give anyone the last bill in your wallet because you might need it, and if you have more than one bill and want to help, give them the least denomination, not the highest. And I HATED having to teach him these things.

 

Lessons Mom learned: (1) Do we need to consider guardianship? What does that mean? Make appointment to see lawyer.  (2)  Stop being critical of parents who keep their adult children with special needs at home. You don’t know their story. Something like this is probably why they do it. I am much more sympathetic. (3) Let it go. Romans 12:19
Never take your own revenge, beloved, but  leave room for the wrath of God, for it is written, “ VENGEANCE IS MINE, I WILL REPAY,” says the Lord.”   VERY comforting to me right now.

 

~ Peggy, Danz mom

 

 

 

 

 

 

Filed Under: Autism, guardianship, Parenting Tagged With: ,

Things I Needed to Know

July 27, 2012 By 1 Comment

Remember the poem, “All I Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten”?  (It is pithy and possibly inspired.) Well, I’ve discovered a few more things I needed to know, after living with hidden disability. You can bet this is NOT an exhaustive list, although it has exhausted me to learn it.

1. Things are not always what they seem – so GO SLOWLY when drawing conclusions.

2. Sometimes things are EXACTLY what they seem – so call a spade a spade. 

3. God was not kidding when He said, “be quick to hear (get the whole story), slow to speak (or you WILL make it worse), and slow to anger (or you will be angry A LOT)….”  James 1:19

4. It is not true I would “do better” or “sin less” if I just had a different race/life other than the one God has set before me: living with hidden disability. My context simply uncovers my sin. It does not produce it. I still must “lay aside … the s-i-n (envying, pride, selfishness…) which so easily entangles [me], and … run with endurance the race that is set before [me].” (Heb 12:1)

5. I did NOT get to choose which race “is set before me” — I DO get to choose how I will respond (thanks to that blessed free will). Note to self: Pouting is not a helpful choice.

6.  I am finite – there is a definite E-N-D to my resources. When the Bible says, “I can do all things through Christ Who strengthens me.” (Phil 4:13) one of those “things” (for me) is saying the word “NO.”

7. Contrary to my younger thinking, “No” is not a cuss word.

8. Just because flexibility is my strength doesn’t mean I can bend enough to survive whatever hits me. I cope not because I can flex enough, but because JESUS is enough. (Enough wisdom, enough comfort, enough hope….)

9. I need help. Some times more than others, from others. That’s OK.

(In God’s description of the body, I am one part, like an eye or something. We don’t see whole bodies of nothing but eyeballs walking around. There’s a reason for that. “the eye cannot say to the hand, “I have no need of you”; or again the head to the feet, “I have no need of you.” 1 Cor 12:21 which would be funny if it weren’t so TRUE.  I need other parts of the body – not the least of which is a brain….)

10. I am not omniscient or omnipotent –  I cannot predict or prevent what comes. I used to torture myself by thinking, “I should’ve seen that coming…” (so I could stop it) But I didn’t. Don’t. Can’t. I can, however, choose how I will respond to it. (yes, I’m repeating myself….)

11. I have learned I am not Jesus, the Savior. Sounds ridiculous, but bears repeating. I cannot save myself, so I certainly cannot save (or fix) my loved ones. At the end of the day, I am truly just “one beggar telling another beggar where to find bread.” (D.T. Niles)

Somewhere in middle school … trying to make sure I am not “always learning but never able to come to the knowledge of the TRUTH.” (II Tim 3:7)!

Joan

 

 

Filed Under: Bible, growth, Journey Tagged With: ,

What Goes Around

July 26, 2012 By Leave a Comment

A funny thing happened at my 20th high school reunion this weekend. I realized that what goes around truly comes around. Sound a little too John Hughes/”Breakfast Club” for you? Well stifle your gagging, because it was.

I was chickenhearted getting off the plane in Milwaukee. Once I overcame the smell of cheese curds and Pabst Blue ribbon, I became convinced that there were plenty of things to be anxious about when seeing people I’d been separated from for 10-20 years. Did I look alright? What if I didn’t remember someone’s name and make a fool of myself? What did I have to show for the last decade or two? Is what I’ve accomplished, enough? My focus wasn’t as much on seeing the people I cared about – those who were such an instrumental part in my own personal development – as it was on me. And I didn’t think I was enough. So in the elevator headed down to the reception, I prayed simply – “Jesus, quell my fear, and just help me to love on people like you did.”

In typical style, He gave me plenty of chances. My conversations with old friends went very deep, very quickly. I had prayed to show love, and I was able to do it by listening, by hugging, by crying. The “what do you do?” question was nearly every time, peripheral. I realized it didn’t matter what I did. It only mattered what I could give.

Love is in the air with good friends Starr, Leyla and Yours Truly.

A good friend of mine – with whom I disagree on certain social issues – was sitting side by side with me at a table. He’d had one vision of me in high school. He wondered, no doubt, if it still held true. His experiences with Christianity had left a bad taste in his mouth, and he was afraid to discuss certain things with me for fear of having to submit to a judgmental lambasting. He was shocked when I took his hand and told him that Jesus loved him, and I did too – no matter what his choices; that there was a place for both of us in Heaven, and that my being able to see him and hug him was a highlight of the reunion. Just a little bit of love. That’s all it took to coax him out with us after the reunion was over – out to a late-night noshing at Denny’s. But somewhere in the melee, I had lost my phone – the phone with video and pictures of my children that could not be replaced.

It wasn’t until the next day, three hours out from our flight that I started to panic. Matt tried remotely installing a tracking device on my phone, which didn’t work because of the spam filter I’d installed on the same phone the week before. We scoured the hotel. We harangued the front desk clerks. Nothing. I put a desperate post on Facebook – my only means of communicating with people whose telephone numbers I didn’t get a chance to take the night before. We were two hours out from our flight (with an un-packed hotel room, and a rental car yet to be returned), when my friend from the night before posted that he had called Denny’s, and they had found the phone – a phone black as the parking lot asphalt it had been laying on. My husband retrieved it from the manager 30 minutes later – an hour prior to the flight that we eventually made – and was told, “It was a miracle I didn’t run it over.” A miracle, indeed. Complete with rock star flourish.

You love on people. And then they love you back by finding your phone. What went around, came right back around. And it was awesome.

If you think this is a circuitous way of coming back to my son’s disability and his struggles with Asperger’s Syndrome, you’d be right. All I can tell you is that being loved on by the Lord helps you love on other people. Even the ones who throw a meltdown at McDonald’s.

- Sarah

Filed Under: Asperger, Blessing, Emotions, Encouragement, Friends, God's presence, Uncategorized, warmth Tagged With: , , ,

On Finding a Therapist

July 25, 2012 By 2 Comments

How do you find a good therapist?  How do you find a counselor within network, close to home or work, and someone who understands the instability of living in a home where hidden disabilities rule?

I have seen at least five therapists over the past few years … sadly, none of them for more than a handful of visits.  My newest therapist, local and covered by my insurance, has repeated the same theme over our last four visits:  “You need to find something  for yourself. Go to a movie, have dinner with friends, find a new hobby.”  I find it hard to believe that after listening to me discuss my trials and challenges, the instability of our life and the intense pressure I feel due to my husband’s limitations, the best advice she has for me is to go to a movie.  She also has mentioned that she feels I should have my cleaning lady come more regularly, and that I should get a massage weekly … clearly, we’re not viewing things through the same financial lens either.

I feel that I am somewhat skilled in explaining what it looks like to live with someone with a hidden disability.  I have been open about my husband’s seizures, brain damage, and memory loss.  While I do seek to protect our family in a public forum such as this one, I have sought to share everything with a few good friends and with the therapists I’ve seen.  I explain the anxiety I feel at the end of each day when I don’t know what things will be like when I come home from work.  I try to explain the weight of responsibility I feel daily as I work with my husband to provide context for him so that he feels less helpless.

I need a therapist who can help me find coping skills for the powerful grief that underpins all that I do.  I need a therapist who can provide me with strategies to overcome my sinful frustration when I have to repeat yet another conversation or help Ben with yet another simple task.  I need a therapist who can help me learn how to handle the guilt I feel when everyone in my house wants to go out and do something (I am the only one who can drive) and all I want to do is stay in.  I need a therapist who understands the instability of living with hidden disabilities and the profound toll this can take on the caregiver.

By God’s grace, my husband has actually found a good therapist.  He feels that his meetings with her are beneficial and are helping him learn coping skills and strategies to accept the limits God has placed on him.  She is not a Christian, but she respects his faith and encourages him in it.  After praying about it, I do not feel it would be wise for me to see the same therapist he does.

How about you?  Do you have a good therapist?  How long did it take you to find her?  Do you think I should try to see the therapist Ben has seen, or to look for someone else?

Or, perhaps, do you think I should just join a book club, spend more time knitting, and go to the movies? –  If so, please call me and we can go together to see the latest chick-flick!

~ Nancy

Filed Under: Acquired Brain Injury, Epilepsy, questions

Gearing Up for Homeschooling 10th Grade

July 24, 2012 By Leave a Comment

It’s only the end of July but our local homeschool curriculum fair was held yesterday. I love school supplies and textbooks and videos but they intimidate me at the same time. There are so many high quality products! The first year that I homeschooled, I spent lots and lots of money buying books and curriculums that looked amazing. I only used a small portion of them. The next year, I was a little more restrained. Now, five years later, I only bought 5 biographies for my son and a few specific books for my daughter.

I have already researched and planned what I am going to begin for Daniel’s 10th grade year, have bought a few things on Amazon, DVRed a lot of things for him to watch, and found a lot of free online resources. I’m more focused than I used to be about planning and buying curriculum. I’m not as much of a kid in the candy shop (although everything still looks just as “yummy” as it did the first time). I have a little more shopper’s self-control.

This year, I understand Daniel and his unique learning needs a little more than I did last year. Every year, I learn a little bit more about him and his learning style and He does too. We are going to do a lot of video and audio based learning for U.S. History. He really retains information that he sees or hears vs. what he reads. We also got to go to the Sixth Floor Museum in Dallas, Texas to learn about JFK, his presidency and his assassination. I hope we can do some awesome field trips for this subject.

Following up on the heels of his successful comedy camp, he is going to participate in ICC (the Institute for Cultural Communicators) and drama at the Theater Center for his drama and public speaking class. I hope that ICC will be really good for his Aspergers-rule-following learning style. ICC teaches ways to communicate clearly and respectfully and ways to respect others and the social situation that you are in at that time. Most importantly, it teaches students to become leaders for Christ and to funnel their speaking and entertaining abilities into a passion for sharing Christ. I explained to him that this group would help him hone his comedy skills and his communication skills so that he could be most effective for Christ and for encouraging others. He was all for it!

Daniel struggles with communicating in writing (he has a disability in written communication) so I am praying about having him work with a tutor (via Skype) for his English class so he can be pushed beyond his limitations in this area and learn to write (or dictate) papers and improve his spelling and written communication as much as possible.

Math will be done online using Khan Academy. It is an awesome step by step, only move on when you’ve got the concept but don’t beat it into the ground, video based website and curriculum. Daniel struggles with memory (number facts, multiplication tables) in math so this should be a rewarding program for him.

Chemistry, personal finance, and Bible will be video and hands on as well.

It takes a little bit of this and a little bit of that so that Daniel can learn well and continue to grow and mature. I hope I am starting out realistically and yet challenging him to be more than he would attempt on his own.

Homeschooling has been a blessing so far for Daniel and for me. I am hoping this year will be the best yet!

~ Brooke

Filed Under: Asperger, Homeschool Tagged With: , , , , , ,

Speaking a Blessing

July 23, 2012 By 2 Comments

We had the privilege of attending a retreat at another church. I was able to take two of my girls and camp on the church property and attend “tent” meetings together. The focus of the retreat was to reconnect as families. There were Gospel concerts, games, fun and activities for everyone to enjoy. The speaker taught on praying for our families and praying together as families. We separated into families and prayed for each other and then held hands as a large group and prayed corporately.

On Sunday morning the speaker taught on speaking a blessing into our children’s lives and our families. I was able to speak into my girl’s lives and pray a blessing over them. Then we went to the altar and a minister prayed a blessing over our families individually. There was hardly a dry eye in the church as we bonded and blessed each other.

How powerful it is to speak blessing over our families and how easy it is to forget to do this. The Israelites were instructed to do this in Numbers 6:24-26, “The Lord bless you and keep you; the Lord make His face shine upon you and be gracious to you; the Lord turn His face toward you and give you peace.”

Deuteronomy 6:5-9 says “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the door frames of your houses and on your gates.”

Lord help me to remember to speak your blessing over my family and teach my children to love you with all of their hearts. May Your commandments govern our lives. I want to live my life as a testimony to you before my children that they would know that you are God and there is no other besides you.

~Twyla

Filed Under: Bible, Blessing Tagged With: ,

Church Day at Home

July 22, 2012 By Leave a Comment

We won’t be at church today … well, not at Burke Community Church, anyway. I’m in my third week of feeling yucky, and Cami’s body is overwhelmed with phlegm. We don’t need to breathe on anyone else, and I’d rather not have anyone else breathing on us.

But it’s Church Day. We haven’t always, but these days we love church. All of us. We see our friends, encourage them, receive encouragement from them, hear God speak through great singing and preaching, and touch base with true Reality: “We are immensely loved and  blessed” as opposed to the every-day-the-same-struggles-when-will-things-get-better-I’m-tired-of-dirty-dishes-and-laundry-am-I-the-only-one-who-cleans-up-around-here-complain-whine-stuck perspective I so often find myself in.

Yet, there’s the germ thing happening today.

So our Church Day will be spent at home. God will still speak to us. We’ll still be encouraged and touch base with true Reality. Here’s the plan. Please join us…

1. A Scripture:

This passage is from Exodus 34, when God is arranging to write a second copy of His commandments because Moses smashed the original tablets when he came down from Mount Sinai and saw the Israelites worshiping the golden calf (see Exodus 32 for that story).

1The LORD told Moses, “Prepare two stone tablets like the first ones. I will write on them the same words that were on the tablets you smashed. 2Be ready in the morning to come up Mount Sinai and present yourself to Me there on the top of the mountain. 3No one else may come with you. In fact, no one is allowed anywhere on the mountain. Do not even let the flocks or herds graze near the mountain.”

4So Moses cut two tablets of stone like the first ones. Early in the morning he climbed Mount Sinai as the LORD had told him, carrying the two stone tablets in his hands.

5Then the LORD came down in a pillar of cloud and called out His own Name, “the LORD,” as Moses stood there in His presence. 6He passed in front of Moses and said, “I am the LORD, I am the LORD, the merciful and gracious God. I am slow to anger and rich in unfailing love and faithfulness. 7I show this unfailing love to many thousands by forgiving every kind of sin and rebellion. Even so I do not leave sin unpunished, but I punish the children for the sins of their parents to the third and fourth generations.”

8Moses immediately fell to the ground and worshiped. 9And he said, “If it is true that I have found favor in Your sight, O Lord, then please go with us. Yes, this is an unruly and stubborn people, but please pardon our iniquity and our sins. Accept us as Your own special possession.”

10The LORD replied, “All right. This is the covenant I am going to make with you. I will perform wonders that have never been done before anywhere in all the earth or in any nation. And all the people around you will see the power of the LORD—the awesome power I will display through you.”
(Exodus 34, NLT)

2. A Song:

Watch this video. Well, you don’t have to watch it necessarily. At least listen to it. The song is amazing, and in this arrangement, Exodus 34 (the scripture you just read) is spoken aloud. As you listen to the lyrics, as the music and truth wash over you, think about those words God spoke to Moses—and the words Moses spoke to God—in light of being a Chosen Family.

Yahweh (You’ve Always Been There) (click to view the video)

From the first break of light to last days
Every echo of time, every evening fade
You’ve always been there

From a baby’s first cry to last breath
Every fight in our lives, every victory dance
You’ve always been there

Ancient One, so amazing, unfailing You are
Holy One, overwhelming my heart with Your love

Yahweh, Yahweh, Faithful God
You’re here to stay
Yahweh, Yahweh
Forever and always the same

Where the sky meets the sea and breaks free
When compassion and love are met with need
You’ve always been there

Ancient One, so amazing, unfailing You are
Holy One, overwhelming my heart with Your love

Yahweh, Yahweh, Faithful God
You’re here to stay
Yahweh, Yahweh
Forever and always the same

All Consuming, Everlasting,
God Almighty, Lord of Glory
All Consuming, Everlasting,
God Almighty, Lord of Glory

Yahweh, Yahweh, Faithful God
You’re here to stay
Yahweh, Yahweh
Forever and always the same

© 2008 Integrity’s Hosanna! Music
Jon Egan/Ross Parsley

3. A Prayer:

YHWH, Almighty God, Holy One,
thank You for choosing us, for choosing me,
for placing me in this Chosen Family.

Forgive me for forgetting true Reality,
for whining and complaining,
for forgetting gratitude for the way You love me and bless me.

On this Church Day, LORD, say Your Name over me and my family.
Declare Who You are in us and through us.
Perform Your wonders in us,
wonders that have never been done before anywhere in all the earth or in any nation.
Let all the people around us see Your awesome power as You display
Your faithfulness, Your forgiveness, Your mercy and grace
to us and through us.

Thank You for Your Name, for speaking it over me,
over us.
Amen.

Hoping you have a fantastic Church Day,

Cassandra

Filed Under: Bible, worship Tagged With: ,
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