Chosen Families

A few days ago, I was deeply moved by a video clip shared on Facebook by a dear friend of mine. It was about childhood cancer, the number one killer of our nation’s children. I thought of my son, the same age her son was when he died of cancer. The thought of losing either of my children so moved me to tears, that I instantly grieved for those parents in the video clip who either were going through this battle with a child or who had lost a child to cancer.

About 3 or so years ago, I had reconnected online with this friend, who graduated with me from high school. Back then, we were different and not exactly close. However, time and experiences had shaped us and changed us both. We had kids around the same ages, having had them later in life. I instantly loved her and her family.

When I read her posts and saw all of the wonderful family pictures she faithfully took, capturing great memories, I was envious. She had two beautiful boys, still had her girlish figure, and her family did fun activities together (sailing, going to the beach, and just having fun together).

I also had two beautiful children, but my figure had drastically changed from just 3 years earlier and, since I had developed M. S., my limited mobility interfered with many family activities. Though envious, I truly enjoyed the person she’d become and always loved reading her posts. I jokingly told her once that I wanted to live vicariously through her. This comment later came back to haunt me.

About one year or so after we reconnected, I was stunned to learn that her oldest son had been in a simple childhood accident that revealed he had a tumor in his liver. It ruptured that day. Her nightmare began on his first day of summer vacation. He’d graduated from 5th grade and was ready for a summer of fun before entering middle school. He died from cancer almost a year from the day of his accident. I was privileged to be able to go to his graveside service and to hug my friend in person, later, at the church.

“Lo, children are an heritage from the LORD; and the fruit of the womb is his reward.” -Psalm 127:3

We are blessed to have the children we’ve been given and to have the privilege to raise them according to God’s Word. Would we want to trade the hidden disabilities of our children for a disease like cancer? I would never wish such a hardship on anyone, but I know God is able to carry any of us through whatever challenges come our way.

“Boast not thyself of tomorrow; for thou knowest not what a day may bring forth.” -Proverbs 27:1

Sometimes another parent seems to “have it all together” and we are envious. But we never know what struggles another parent faces or may face in the future. We may face things we never imagined could happen. That parent who “has it all together” may have her whole world come “crashing down around her” in an instant.

“Come unto me, all ye that labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart, and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.” -Matthew 11:28-30

I cannot control what circumstances come into my life. I have learned that the hard way. However, God doesn’t intend for me to handle things all by myself. How can I? Some burdens in life are too much for us to carry. Corrie Ten Boom told a story of her father using an example of a heavy satchel that was too much for her to carry. She later used that simple lesson to tell the Lord when “things” were too hard for her to “carry” during her time spent in a Nazi prison camp. We may not be in a Nazi prison camp, but the same truth applies to all of us. When life’s burdens are too hard for us to carry, we are encouraged to “cast” all of them upon Jesus because He cares for us.

Let’s face it, the grass is NOT always greener on the other side. God knows what lies ahead and is already there. He can “carry” those things that are too hard for us to bear.

-Grace